kels(dot)blog

I open my eyes
when he kisses me
just to remind myself
that he’s beautiful. His hair,
eyes, gentle, smile, his
body, his hands, I shiver
when he touches me, in
delight. in delight. in delight
I can shiver in delight because he’s
beautiful. He touches me with
hands that aren’t yours. I hated
those hands, those big clunky
animal stumps, your back, your
face, the shape of your head
I hated your head
When you kissed me the first time
I felt
nothing
and then I retched